The 3 Rivers 5K Challenge

Why would I offer $5,000 of my own money to assist the wealthiest sports owners in Western Pennsylvania, two of them billionaires, regarding a generic human rights issue in the realm of venue security?  It’s an unusual question.  One that obviously has an unusual answer.

To prevent mass injury and loss of life in a black swan event that could rival 9/11.

This involves the prospect of twenty, simultaneous human stampedes.

Nine NFL stadiums, eleven MLB ballparks and probably a NASCAR motor speedway.

So I made these little business cards with the following content.  And much to the dismay of the city of Pittsburgh, I hand them out like candy.


Attention: Pittsburgh sports fans

The 3 Rivers 5K Challenge

If you can convince Art Rooney II (Heinz Field), Bob Nutting (PNC Park) and/or Mario Lemieux (PPG Paints Arena) to disseminate the following public safety message…

“Please be advised, it is NOT our policy to issue venue evacuation orders via your personal cell phone”

… I will pay you the cash sum of $2,500 and make a matching donation to a mutually agreed upon 501-c3 Pittsburgh area charity.

For additional information: (Artificially Generated Stampede Awareness Foundation)


Now why would I do this?  Well, because you have a right to know the truth.  Legitimate evac orders for large, confined crowds (stadiums, ballparks, arenas, etc.) would NEVER be delivered via your personal cell phone.  Why?  Because that’s not how it works.  Established protocol dictates using the public address system in tandem with the video monitors.  This is not convoluted.  Despite what our government (DHS, FCC, NCS4, etc.) and private industry (NFL, MLB, NBA, NHL, etc.) opt to deliberately conceal, you are allowed to be cognizant of this tiny, little snippet of basic public safety info.  You’re allowed to know this stuff.  You’re allowed to be aware.  There’s even a spiffy slogan for the dilemma  — “See Something, Say Something.”  If information of this nature were to “emanate” from your cell phone… well duh, some person or malicious entity is actively trying to force an unscheduled evacuation.  Why?   Well, in order to indiscriminately murder innocent civilians.  It’s almost certainly an attempt to contaminate the venues, foment panic and create human stampedes.  Regardless, there are two other remote possibilities.

1.  It’s an accidental wireless, mass transmission.  Similar to the push-notification regarding a pesky North Korean nuclear missile targeting Hawaii.


2.  Someone is attempting to evacuate a slew of mega-crowds solely for their own personal amusement.  Just to see if they can pull it off.

But trust me.  Realistically, it would be neither.  The Pittsburgh Pirates are more likely to win the Super Bowl as the Steelers take the World Series.

So here’s why this is a big deal.  And I cannot stress this point enough.  If a scenario like this unfolded, the actual “evac information” would probably be delivered in a manner deemed “sociologically and psychologically unpredictable.”  Uniquely asymmetric and designed to spread virally.  It would be specifically attenuated to create hysteria.  Also, you’d likely be receiving the information second-hand, from those you implicitly trust, i.e., family and friends.  Those concerned for your safety and general welfare.  Those who were hoodwinked by a decentralized, pernicious prank.

If this is starting to sound confusing or conspiratorial, that’s understandable.  So let’s keep it simple.  Although there are roughly a dozen “attack vectors” for saturating large crowds with deliberately false cellular information, not to mention an infinite number of hypothetical possibilities, let’s frame this whole thing in the form of a single Trump tweet.  Or as I like to call it… fake news.  Sound familiar?

Not realistic enough?  How about one of his patented tweet storms?

Note the difference.  The initial tweet was designed to create mass chaos.  However, the tweetstorm takes it one step further.  Panic and confusion accompanied with a blanket, aggressive, time-sensitive command.  And if you believe there’s some top secret, real-time contingency plan for either scenario, I’m afraid I’ve got some bad news (spoken like Pittsburgh’s SuperGenius Mark Madden).

Now maybe you’re an ardent Trump supporter who believes the President can do no wrong.  Or perhaps you think he’s a tactical genius, highly versed in emergency evacuation protocol, threat condition analysis vs. threat emergency analysis and the nuanced practicalities of varying venue incident command structures.  Well, so be it.

Or maybe you think his twitter account could never be manipulated or compromised.

(By the way, the tweet directly above is actually legit)

Or maybe you’re one of these internet detectives who realized the date and time stamp on the tweets didn’t correspond with the scheduled major sporting events.

Road block!  I beg you, for just one brief moment, to put on your thinking cap.

Hmm, let’s see here.  Now if I can construct these fake Trump tweets, what’s to prevent me from saturating the internet with this shit?  Using a troll farm in Karachi, Pakistan or Moscow, Russia.  Pyongyang, North Korea or Wilmington, Delaware.  Bulk posting the information via a spam bot on local tv reporters’ social media pages (facebook, twitter, instagram, etc.) in the respective cities of every NFL & MLB team.  Every network (CBS, ABC, NBC & FOX), every radio personality, every sports journalist, every member of Congress, every governor and mayor, every Hollywood celebrity, and so on.

Hey, maybe I shouldn’t be such a Debbie downer!  Or in this case, yinzer upper.  After all, I’m quite certain there’s an “angelic internet goddess” that sifts through all those mean online messages.  And she collaborates with a venerable cyber-God who exclusively looks after the national security interests of the United States.  Yes, but of course!  I knew it!  All the really bad stuff gets filtered out!  Cue the Lee Greenwood — God Bless the U.S.A.

E-gad!  This could finally shed some light on Trump’s unwavering support from the evangelicals!  But that’s neither here nor there.

I assure you, this brand of fake news/disinformation would easily become weaponized.  Regardless of validity, credibility or attempts to verify.  Once you hit that send button, it’s out there.  It becomes an open-sourced cyber-attack.

In order to make technically informed behavioral decisions, OODA feedback loops require time.  But cellular transmissions occur in real-time.  This conflict, a fundamentally generic “crack in the system,” cannot be mitigated or substantively reconciled.

Social media experts use the term “info-bomb,” but I prefer the term “viral blitzkrieg,” as it captures the essence of such an attack.  You simply cannot suddenly push dangerous material like this into the public domain without there being significant ramifications.  And yes, I realize it’s all based on speculation.  It kinda helps to view the problem with a long-term event horizon.  Could something like this ever be attempted?  Just the mere presence of such alarmingly unanticipated tweets would have definitive real-world consequences.  From a sheer numbers perspective, I find it extremely doubtful that 100% of those targeted would be dismissive, shrug it off, or instantly decipher the entire event to be a colossal cyber-hoax.  It’s just a numbers game.  Some percentage would panic.  Some percentage would run.  And that’s where those genetically ingrained herding instincts kick in.  Hey, don’t let anyone tell you there’s no downside to this evolution thingy.

Think of it in terms of Isaac Newton’s laws of physics/motion.  But instead of the physical world, it’s the cyber-world.  For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.

Where?  When?  Well, two specific dates seem to stand out (9-9-18 & 9-16-18).  I could even approximate the exact time.  3pm.  Why?  Because it represents the biggest bang for your buck.

September 9, 2018:

NFL stadiums — Indianapolis, Baltimore, East Rutherford, New Orleans, Foxborough, Minneapolis, Miami, Indianapolis, Cleveland

MLB ballparks — Toronto, Detroit, New York City, Cincinnati, St. Petersburg, Pittsburgh, Washington D.C., Milwaukee, Minneapolis, Denver

Indianapolis Motor Speedway


September 16, 2018:

NFL stadiums — Atlanta, Landover, Nashville, Tampa, Pittsburgh, East Rutherford, Orchard Park, Green Bay, New Orleans

MLB ballparks — Boston, Baltimore, New York City, Tampa, Cleveland, Philadelphia, Atlanta, Milwaukee, Houston, Kansas City, St. Louis, Chicago

Las Vegas Motor Speedway

I’d also be leery of September 30, 2018.  Eight NFL games coinciding with fifteen MLB games as well as a NASCAR race in Charlotte, North Carolina.

Do you see what I’m getting at?  This ain’t terribly complex.  It’s merely the wireless equivalent of shouting FIRE in a crowded theater… on cellular steroids sprinkled with a wireless dash of human growth hormone pills.  Just don’t call me Yinzerdamus.

Hey, ever wonder why NOBODY is allowed to talk about it?  Well I have.  And it’s not rocket science.  All the typically taboo conjecture… plausible deniability, hypothetical litigation, the undiscussability precedent (sensitive social mores regarding people being trampled and crush asphyxiated), government resistance to exploring transformative subject matter, the lose-lose proposition (zero upside, enormous downside), the moral catch-22 (you acknowledge it, you own it), and of course, the generational warfare paradox (killing without weapons).  Not to mention the biggest factor of them all.  MONEY.  Even though the solution is free… simply divulging the truth.  One thing is for certain… it’s always about money.

I know.  I know.  Lest we forget, we are the hyper-capitalist capital of the world — ’Merica.

Go figure.


Rules for The 3 Rivers 5K Challenge:

Open to any citizen of the United States.
Only one winner.
Payment dispensed in the amount of $1,000 per year for a duration of five years.
Payable immediately upon verification.
$500 cash to the individual each year.  $500 check to the charity each year.

Public safety information must be conveyed at all applicable events: sports, concerts, misc.
Public safety information must be conveyed in two forms: Verbal — public address system (inside or outside).  Written — official program or ticket stub.

For additional information, please call 304-312-1395.